Blue Hydrangeas: an Alzheimer's Love Story

     Blue Hydrangeas: An Alzheimer's Love Story by Marianne Sciucco is a real love story.  Not a true love story, but a real one.  

     I think love is the subject most written about in all of history.  Listen to the radio - almost all the songs you hear will be about love.  The greatest plays ever written are about love.  Countless movies and books have been written on the subject.  Almost every fairy tale ever told is about love.  It's the thing we most crave.  People need food, water, and shelter to survive.  They need love to live.  That is why it is a universally sought after... thing.  The only problem with the plays, music, books, movies, etc. is that they only seem to catch the first glimpse of love.  Most would call it infatuation, puppy love, or even lust, in most cases.  My favorite appellation for it is twitterpated.  What most people don't realize is that those rushed feelings of deep emotion are only the tip of the iceberg... the door to love, if you will.  Real love starts where most relationships leave off, after that initial rush goes away.  After the first big fight, or the big wedge of different lives trying to mesh together.  After the excitement of finding out everything about the person you are so enthralled with.  That's when true love begins to grow; when you have to work for it.  You have to begin sacrificing, not just superficially, but truly sacrificing because that person is worth way so much more than whatever else is going on in your life.  That is what Blue Hydrangeas is about. 

     Before I get into the review, I just wanted to say what a truly wonderful portrayal of life with someone with Alzheimer's Mrs. Sciucco painted for the reader.  My grandfather had Alzheimer's disease.  I was little, and don't remember much, but I do remember his confusion.  We'd be at Grandma and Grandpa's house, watching T.V., and suddenly he'd yell at us for being in his house.  

     "What are you kids doing in my house!"

     "Grandpa, we're your grandkids,"we'd say.

     "Who's kids are you," he'd ask.

     "We're Paul's kids."

     "That's right," He'd say.  Then he'd go back to watching T.V. like nothing had happened, only to repeat the conversation several minutes later.  

     I remember thinking that he was being silly sometimes.  Sometimes he'd scare us.  Sometimes he'd worry us, but mostly he was just Grandpa, and we knew he was sick.  Unlike in this great novel, my Grandmother was not able to keep Grandpa at home. She got breast cancer, and couldn't take care of him for the last months of his life.  When he died, the nurses said he'd been calling out her name all through the night.  I remember thinking how scared he must have been, knowing how confused he was most of the time, at not having his beloved wife there to comfort him as his spirit left him.

     I share this because Mrs. Sciucco paints a perfect picture of what it is really like to live with such a person.  The experiences Jack and Sara and their family go through are all too familiar to me.  I read her bio and found out that she was a nurse, and worked with Alzheimer's patients, so it all makes sense.  Thank you, Mrs. Sciucco for bringing light to this difficult disease.  It's more than just being forgetful.  It really affects the lives of everyone around the patient.

    Okay, on to the review.  Sara has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. She's scared of losing everything she's worked her whole life to build -  family, friends, their home - so she makes Jack (her husband) promise that he won't allow her to be put into a home.  Jack vows that he will keep them together no matter what.

     As is, sadly, the case in most such instances, everyone wants to intervene on their behalf.  Jack finds that to keep his vow, he has to battle his confused wife and her constantly failing state of mind, his own children, doctors, nurses, and case workers.  Everyone seems to "know" what is best for the old couple.  They are all kind people, and are trying to do what is best for the couple, but Jack can't bear to be away from his one true love.

     With his failing heart, he finally gives in to the pressure of all of those around him, but when the day comes for him to take his dear Sara to the care facility, she has a lucid day.  He can't bear to break his promise to her while she's aware of what he's doing.  Instead, he decides to take her around the cape, where they live, and try to rekindle memories, and their life-long love.

     This story is warming to the heart, and though it's not the twitterpated kind of love you see so prevalent in the world today, it's a story of true love.

     I know my mom would especially love this book, and I know she's reading this blog so, Mom, I'd get it for you and Doug to read.  For the rest of my readers, It's a great book, click the link at the beginning of this post to get it on amazon.

     I give this novel 

Ondine

     Ondine starring Colin Farrell and Alicja Bachleda is a romantic/drama, rated pg-13 for the usual romatic/drama reasons.

     So, when you're looking for a romantic film to watch with the wife, you always hope the story will be good enough to keep your interest.  A lot of directors throw some skin in their films to keep the guys interest, but that doesn't always work.  I actually love romantic movies, and love having a wife to drag along so I don't look like a sap when I watch them, but this one caught my attention because it had Colin Farrell in it, and I love most of his movies, so I figured it would be good.  I wasn't disappointed.  This is a movie, guys, you can safely watch with your wife, girlfriend, significant other, etc.  The story is good.  There's no action scenes, though Syracuse (Ferrell) does get in a fight, but I promise you won't be disappointed.

     Okay, so a little background before the review.  I didn't know what a "Selkie" was.  I thought, mermaid, but that's wrong.  Selkies are mythical creatures of Scottish/Irish origin.  They are seal-type creatures who can come to land every so many years (there's a bit of discrepancy as to how often, and when they can come to land).  While on land, they shed their fur skins to become beautiful women.  They love to dance and frolic on the land until the sea calls them home, then they put their skins back on and return to the ocean, lake, or sea where they belong.  The pull of the sea is maddening to a Selkie, and they will break all ties, no matter how strong, to get back.  Because they are such beautiful creatures in human form, a lot of fairy tales are spun about men falling in love with the human-form Selkie, so they hide their skins so that they won't return to the sea.  These stories are always tragedies because the Selkie inevitably finds her skin, and she will return to the sea even if it means leaving a love and children behind.  So that is the set-up for Ondine.  It helps to know the folklore before watching the film.

     Syracuse is a recovering alcoholic fisherman trying to take care of his daughter Annie.  The problem is that he lives in a small town where everybody knows everything about everybody, and they stick their noses where they don't belong.  Syracuse's ex-wife has custody of their daughter.  Unlike Syracuse, the ex still has a problem with booze.  Their poor daughter, Annie, has kidney failure, and frequently has to undergo dialysis while she waits for a transplant.  Syracuse can't count on his ex to keep their daughter alive.

     When Syracuse pulls the beautiful Ondine out of the water in his nets the the troubles begin piling up.  Ondine is petrified at being found, so Syracuse hides her in his dead mother's shack.  When his daughter discovers Ondine, she decides that the woman is a Selkie.  Syracuse thinks she is running from an abusive husband or boyfriend.  The truth of myth vs. reality isn't revealed until the very end.  

     Annie and Ondine bond, Syracuse and Ondine fall in love, but unlike most sappy love stories, the plot takes a very real turn for the worse.  

     This movie really surprised me because they took what would be a fairy tale and added realistic aspects of all of the wonderful, complicated mess we call love.  You don't feel as if you're watching an Indie movie.  The acting is incredible and a bit heart-wrenching.  I'm actually surprised that Ms. Bachleda's career didn't take off more after this film.  There is a bit of a dark undertone, so just be prepared for it.  Overall, though, the film was really enjoyable.

     It's actually on netflix right now if you have an account, or you can click on the link at the beginning of this review, and get it on amazon.

    I give this movie